On being older and single

Fearless-e1382723753637I divorced at 48 and I thought the world was over, basically.  I had been a stay at home wife and had little outside work experience.  The last thing on my mind was having sex or dating or anything social.  I was so numb and wounded it was a chore just to get up in the morning.  I kept exercising, trying to eat properly, and continued my yoga and writing.  Sexually, I was so numb that I didn’t even self-pleasure as it didn’t feel good.   Finally about a year after my divorce I started feeling like I had some desire.  Not that much but enough to motivate me to date or at least look for sex.   That went a lot better than I expected and I began to have very enjoyable sex something that had been missing from my marriage.  Getting divorced later in life  can be very painful even if the marriage was bad and abusive.   It is just a painful process.  While I was having very good sex I wasn’t really connecting with my partners or myself.  It was just something I did to feel better about my life.  I had a partner that introduced me to Tantra and another one that introduced me to sensual and healing massage.  Those two things did reconnect me with people and myself.  I don’t pretend to have all the answers.  I don’t even know most of the questions.  However, I have found that yoga and especially Tantra for me has provided me with the techniques to better manage my life, my health and to achieve better sex at my age than I had through out most of my life. While I do not have as much sex as I did when I was young, the sex I have is better.

About jill_111@msn.com

writer, yoga, cowboy boots, Vikings, sex, Tantra, enlightenment, dogs, hounds, grand bleu
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