Tantra is a style of yoga. There are literally dozens of types and styles of yoga All types of yoga has a goal of integration of mind and body, and to activate the Kundalini energy that resides in our body. This energy is the awakening of the self. For me it is a release of expectations and knowledge of that being me is enough. Tantra strives for a sense of oneness. This aspect of Tantra and lead many to assume it is only a sexual practice and that is not true. In fact, those people that get really hung up on the sexual aspect of Tantra actually miss the best teachings. Does that mean Tantra isn’t sexual and can’t help with my sex life. No. Tantra massage, breathing, mediations, and movements can help with sexual energy. Tantra can help with developing sexual intimacy between partners. However it is not Viagra. It does not provide a quick fix. The body and the mind need to be reprogramed and that does take time and work, however not unpleasant work.
Tantra’s central teaching is embracing the whole. The good the bad the ugly the beautiful. By embracing the whole we transcend duality of good and bad and embrace the sexual and the spiritual as one. We see the body as an extension of the divine. The union between men and women is a chance at enlightenment. When we orgasm the energy brushes against the base of the central channel and gives us a glimpse into the divine. That is why everyone likes orgasms so much. They feel heavenly and they are supposed to.
What Tantra is not is somebody advertising themselves as a Tantra goddess and giving out hand jobs. It is also not some sort of secret knowledge to only be given to those deemed worthy by some guru. The strongest truest guru is our own heart. When that guru is another person we tend to put expectations on them to act in a certain way and they will disappoint us. Does that mean we should not seek out people to learn from, no. But the teachings of others have to be weighed by our own heart and what we know to be true.