Everything is wrong with a sexless marriage. The lack of love and passion is evident to everyone, your children, your grand children, your friends. The lesson people learn from you isn’t loyalty, commitment, or love. They learn joyless partnering, suffering, resentment and dishonesty.
All sexless relationships are based on a lie of some kind. Women don’t stop liking sex when they get older. That is a lie. Sexual desire doesn’t disappear in a long term marriage. That is a lie. Sex hurts. That is a lie. Whatever the lie is that is being told it infests the relationship with dishonesty.
A marriage without sex is like having a five course meal placed in front of you and pushing if away to eat cold cereal. The cereal might sustain you, like self-pleasuring sustains your limited sex, but it never nourishes or heals. It will not produce good health and contentment.
Men do not honor their marriage by letting the woman decide not to have sex. A partner that refuses to celebrate the marriage bed is not living up to their promise to be faithful. When one partner decides not to have sex they have literally said being faithful isn’t important in our marriage and neither is love or joy or true intimacy. If the other partner doesn’t compassionately bring this issue up they are saying the same, ” I am willing to suffer and let my partner suffer rather than risk honesty and true intimacy.”
And that is the lesson you teach with your body to everyone around you. I live with two dogs. They understand me perfectly as they know my body language. And other dogs generally respond to me as my body doesn’t convey anything to them but positive emotions.
You might not say that you have a sexless and therefore passionless marriage, but everyone can read that in ever interaction. Your children, your family, your friends, your grandchildren. It is apparent, a key factor to happiness is missing.
Sex is essential to well-being just the same as breathing and eating and sleeping are. Sex is important to the mind and body. To disregard sex as unimportant is to disavow your basic humanity. It isn’t normal. It isn’t natural. It is like living a half life. Sex is the fire in our body our creative force our gift to our beloved. To live a sexless marriage or even a sexless life is to have one foot in the grave.